THE GOOD ENOUGH MOTHER PODCAST

Reclaiming our Motherhood from the ‘shoulds’ this holiday season

December 21 2022

EMPOWERED MOTHERING; MOTHERHOOD AT CHRISTMAS; MOTHERS AND THE HOLIDAY SEASON; MENTAL LABOUR, MATERNAL THINKING, EMOTIONAL LABOUR; GUILT, LIBERATED MOTHERING PRACTICES

with psychotherapist, author, and speaker Anna Mathur

Today’s conversation is with author, psychotherapist, speaker, and Mum of three, Anna Mathur.

Anna and I dive into reflecting on the complexities of motherhood over the holiday season, and consider how we can prepare ourselves for the increase in emotional and mental labour that can come with this busy time.

Anna shares her perspective on how to enjoy a magical yet simple Christmas, dealing with disappointment, tips on how to say ‘no’ without feeling like we are letting people down, setting boundaries and more.

Tune in to invite a sense of reflection, lightness and self-compassion for yourself during this holiday season.

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— Anna Mathur in conversation with Sophie Brock, Ep #86 The Good Enough Mother Podcast

There are some wonderful memories that can be made when we allow freedom in in little ways.

We can almost have a physical reaction at the thought of disappointing people. And you know what I think when it comes to our children? That healthy disappointment and how to navigate that is one of the best skills that we can teach them. We can acknowledge that disappointment. We can make space for that. And they'll realise that life carries on and they're going to face bigger disappointments than not having a party like that mate had. So it's a really healthy thing. It's a really healthy thing to learn.

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"When we're stressed, and when we're pressuring ourselves - we're tense. We place these restrictions around us. So I think the more we let go of these “shoulds” - the more that we challenge whether we actually have a decision in this - the more easeful we can be in situations and the more joy that our children will see."

— Anna Mathur in conversation with Sophie Brock, Ep #86 The Good Enough Mother Podcast
"When I think back to my childhood, a lot of the memories that I remember, my parents didn't even feature in. I was in the woods, running around making dens, creating stories with my siblings, my friends, and there wasn't the pressure to be having a good time because it was all created and curated for you."

— Anna Mathur in conversation with Sophie Brock, Ep #86 The Good Enough Mother Podcast
"It's a vulnerable thing, though, isn't it? When we say that I can't. I think for some of us, feeling vulnerable and needing other people is a really challenging thing. But it gets easier. It gets easier in time as we start rewriting that narrative of 'other people won't be able to withstand my asking of them'..."

— Anna Mathur in conversation with Sophie Brock, Ep #86 The Good Enough Mother Podcast
"Perhaps we will disappoint people when we say, 'you know what? I can't do a big Christmas this year.' And I think it's starting to really just acknowledge that someone being disappointed doesn't mean we are in and of ourselves disappointing, because I think often that's the narrative that we jump to: that I've disappointed someone, therefore, in and of myself, I'm a disappointment."

— Anna Mathur in conversation with Sophie Brock, Ep #86 The Good Enough Mother Podcast
"And I think when we do things out of a sense of duty, and we do sometimes - we need to sometimes - there is a sacrificial element to certain events in the calendar that we choose to do to maintain relationships, or perhaps that are important to us, or perhaps as a gesture to those whom those things are important to."

— Anna Mathur in conversation with Sophie Brock, Ep #86 The Good Enough Mother Podcast

THERAPY

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Pep talks packed with grounding words for motherhood feelings. Enjoy a twice weekly dose of The Therapy Edit where she takes therapy out of the therapy room to calm, inspire, challenge, encourage and equip you.

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meet

Anna Mathur

Passionate about taking therapy out of the therapy room, Anna Mathur is widely celebrated for her accessible mental health advice and the light-bulb moments that she offers across her platforms including, Instagram @annamathur, 164k best-selling books, popular podcast The Therapy Edit (hurtling towards 1m downloads) and online motherhood platform The MotherMind Way.

Often told through her own experiences, Anna has a unique approach to mental health, whether providing advice on anxiety, coping with overwhelming or encouraging self-worth.

Anna’s must-read books Mind Over Mother: Every Mum’s Guide to Worry and Anxiety in the First Years and Know Your Worth went straight into the top 10 of The Sunday Times bestsellers list.

As her profile continues to rise, she regularly features in outlets including the Daily Telegraph, BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour, Grazia, Marie Claire, The Sun, Closer, Stylist, Mother and Baby, and has recently appeared on coveted podcasts hosted by Giovanna Fletcher, Emma Gannon and Deliciously Ella.

Her authentic, energetic and upbeat approach to mental health has created a highly engaged audience, especially among mothers.

A mum-of-three, Anna was inspired to write her first book Mind Over Mother following her own experience with challenging emotions during her early years.

Anna went on to launch the popular online platform The MotherMindWay in 2021, offering a catalogue of powerful video guides and courses to equip mothers with tools and knowledge on how to look after their emotional well-being and gain more happiness throughout motherhood and beyond.

Often sought after to deliver corporate seminars and add value to brands with her impactful style of speaking about mental well-being, Anna enjoys public speaking. Alongside others, has delivered webinars and workshops to Bosch, Google, Grazia magazine, Marie Claire, Fatface, UCL, and Neom.

“I think sometimes it is just lowering the bar. And knowing that you don't have to be the maker of all the memories, and some of the things that they'll remember most fondly, you won't even feature in. It’s letting go of that control and that responsibility, which can challenge identity. It's a journey of acceptance and acknowledging that, yeah, some good stuff can happen without you.”